As Easy as Acceptance? Not a Chance

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Time after time, humans are faced with that predicament of trying to forget somebody who really meant the world to them.
Here is a familiar story, boy meets girl; boy becomes prince charming; girl falls madly in love; boy leaves the girl; girl cries for over a year, gets stressed out and fights to forget the painful past, all too common.
And while hurt and pain have come to fill society more than happiness and joy, it's not a great wonder why suicide and mental patients are on the rise.
But how do you move on after a devastating end to a great tale? How do you conquer time in the unending quest to forget and happily move on? Truth be told, it's harder than it looks and even so, it takes a really long time to walk free from the past.
Imagine a situation where you break up with someone and you meet them a year later having happily moved on while somehow you lost track of time and are stuck right where you were, it will hurt to the core believe me on that.
But being faced with so much in life, at some point it comes to question if it is really worth it to keep on holding on to the past rather than moving on.
Research puts this into a rather fulfilling perspective by stating that the human mind has always been emotionally imbalanced, in essence, we want to hold on to the good stuff and even when a person who used to be so good to us turns bad and hurts us, we are constantly playing safe and keeping their good memories in our heads just for consolation, and there lies the start of great hurt and pain.
It hurts sometime to move on because it essentially means starting over from scratch.
Some people would crash after a divorce, its common sense.
A marriage that lasted 30years ends suddenly and you somehow think moving on will be so damn easy? Not any time soon pal.
And while my male friends read this and brush it off saying stress is for the ladies and weaker men, I beg to differ.
Being born and raised an African has its privileges, pros and cons...
believe me.
In my community men are supposed to be superior and seem invincible all the time.
We were never meant to crash and we are brought up with that state of mind.
It is even passed to us by default just by the way our parents behave.
Take for example my mom gets pissed at my dad and leaves.
My dad doesn't care believe me.
He doesn't call her, just tells my little bro to call his mum up and ask when she is coming back.
Who does that!! He poses superior to us when he is the same guy who will be cold all through the night, he will still be the one to wake up and mind the kids-he is so lucky the youngest kid in our family can actually cook!-but truth be told however, I think it hurts him a lot, he is just too poor in showing it.
Or maybe he just wants to shift blame so that he plays safe in the long run.
I think it's pathetic; deep inside, he hurts but doesn't want to show it, how then will I express my stressful moment if I had no role model to look up to? So male die fast because they cry less.
A guy gets dumped, he 'moves' on really fast.
Not a chance! He doesn't...
he pretends because emotions are for girls! Pretty weird but it's a perfect explanation believe me.
And that is how you die in a year with a stress related problem because you chose ego over salvation.
To heal means you have to accept reality first.
Quit questioning the events and accept them as they really are.
Your boyfriend cheated on you, yup! He did, your wife left you and took away all your money, accept you are ultimately super broke because you trusted your wife, sounds easy, it's not.
We are hardwired to believe in a utopia even when it doesn't exist.
A person would rather believe he or she is right rather than accept reality and get hurt by it.
If you get dump, your friends are so quick to tell you such stuff as "You were too good for him...
you don't deserve him/her...
he/she is an idiot for leaving you...
you are amazing" all lies.
It would be so much easier if you accepted reality rather than ran from it.
After full acceptance, moving on becomes real easy.
Let's face reality for just one moment, your most recent heartbreak or demise will not be your last.
If your tendency is that of not moving on and caring your past into the present, when shall you ever experience progress? And most of all, when shall you crash down, coz you will ultimately? Nothing is ever easy, but if it's worth it, why not just go ahead and try it? Why do we have to be stuck in a shadow that is a constant reminder of pain and hurt? Can't we just accept it and move on? Somebody said that in this life we all fall at a given time in life, it's perfectly normal, but what sets us all apart is how fast we rise and move on...
true, but I think one should be judged by how well they get up and move on.
Our addiction to speed is the other factor that will ultimately lead to our unending suffering in life.
Instant this, instant that! There is nothing like instant healing or moving on.
This is not a miracle camp, so it takes time.
Healing is a step towards understanding one self and building a better tomorrow by making sure today was dealt with accordingly.
Let's take a case of a house.
You work you back off and build a very nice house.
It pays off because you are simply enjoying the fruits of your labour.
The Mother Nature takes it personal and destroys the whole house.
We are talking about flattening a piece of real estate as if it never existed.
Now what would you do as a normal and capable human being?I am guessing an answer like, move on or build another house are somewhere in your mind.
Exactly, you don't cry all year round, you don't walk as if it never happened.
Off course it did and you not accepting it just makes it a whole lot harder than you may think.
So essentially what you do is find money and build another home.
Same goes for your pain and hurt, it happens, accept it and find a solution to the quest in hand, that the price of progress.
I know a thing or two about pain, hurt and grief.
I also know that acceptance goes a long way in healing an internal wound; it's just how it is.
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